unf**k your life

1st of January 2023:

I’d just woken up after being out in London till 2am with a friend.

Surface-level conversations. No deep connections. Loud music. Champagne is flowing.

I was sat in the corner, drinking water, thinking, “Is this as good as life gets?”

By 9am I was out of the house, met a friend at the gym.

Told him how I felt. “Empty and lost”.

He said to me as he was warming up:

“Stop trying to fit in in places you’ve outgrown, Lara. It’s almost like you’re trying to be miserable by surrounding yourself by people who don’t get you.”

Ouch.

A year later, here I am, thankful for having friends who cut the BS.

Because from that moment on, I stopped conforming, became unapologetic, and said no to everything that didn’t align with me. It worked out pretty well.

7 Steps to Unf**k Your Life

1. Cut our your bad habit friends.

"If you hang out with five millionaires, you'll be the sixth”

But, If you hang out with five unsuccessful people, you are likely to become the sixth.

You choose.

A big part of who you are is who you’re surrounded by.

Unfriend, unfollow, and mute anyone who doesn’t serve you.

Decide what your ideal friend looks like.

Do their habits align with your ideal ones?

• Do their goals align with yours?

• Do they support you?

• Do they inspire you?

If the answer is no, let them go.

“But Lara, if I do this I’ll have no friends left and I’ll be alone”

Cool, learn how to embrace solitude. There is so much power in it.

But also, I was in the same position. You want to know what I did?

I watched podcasts, a ton of them. Interviews with people that inspired me.

That had habits I wanted, that supported the vision, and that had made it big.

I created my own friendship group, my mini mastermind.

Build your own “table” - with time, the right people will want to sit in it.

I promise.

2. Raise the bar

Three-step process:

1. Have a standard of what you’re doing should look like (I reference David Goggings and Jasmin Alic a lot)

2. Have daily actions that are consistently upgrading you (posting daily on social or going for a daily run)

3. Ask yourself, is this the best it could be? (The answer should be no, there’s always room for growth)

Do it again until you’re 99% at the level your “heroes” are. Don’t settle for any less.

Stop fucking settling for average. Please.

I see way too many people settling, “just” doing it.

You owe yourself a fair shot at doing things with excellence.

Otherwise, you’re telling yourself you can only “half-ass” do things.

(Here’s how I did it with content, but it mirrored my life too)

3. Focus

No, I’m not talking about going all in on monk mode and sunlight and cold plunges.

I’m talking about having simple goals, and to do lists.

For social media:

Stop trying to grow in every platform.

Don’t be mediocre at 5 platforms when you can be elite at one.

Don’t “diversify” until you have at least 50k on one.

Focus on mastering your craft, then multiply. This is easier to leverage.

For business:

Don’t try to do too much.

Everyday, have 3 main tasks to do.

Easier to tackle big issues when you have unique focus.

_{This I learned from my dad when I was having a full mental breakdown because I had university finals and just onboarded 3 new agency clients) thanks, dad!!!!!}

The easiest way to focus is to have a goal. Shift your attention towards growth, not lack.

Massive mindset hack: Say: “I get to do work today” not “I have to do work”

4. Disappear

If you’re like me and can’t focus on your own…. Unless it’s enforced by a looming deadline.

Do your best to remove all distractions.

• Delete social media for a month.

• Move to the middle of nowhere.

• Change your gym and work locations.

• Or do whatever you have to do to to get where you want to go.

  look, I like to take extreme and massive action… you should too.

So pick ONE thing you can do today to remove distractions and commit to doing it for the next 90 days.

Even if it’s deleting Instagram from your phone.

(But moving to the middle of nowhere in the British countryside works better just saying…. Joking!!)

Here’s where I lived for a year just as a reminder.

So… much… green. Good for walks too! Clear mind, happy life really,

5. Play the game

In order to take massive action, you need massive rewards.

When you know what the end goal is, it’s easy to keep playing.

There are literally 32 levels in a game of Super Mario Bros.

Every level is almost identical; they just keep on getting harder.

But people still play it, obsessively why? Because we wanna get to win by saving Princess Peach from Bowser.

Now think if your life is a game…and your goal is to save your dream result [i.e., building your dream biz] from Bowser [i.e. failure].

Can you win the day? Fuck yea there’s no losers in this newsletter gang the fuck.

How?

Simplify your days; take small daily compounding actions and one big one.

Do the simple fundamentals, and take calculated risks.

This year, I’ve grown my personal brand and business in record time.

It was a result of those small actions.

I can give you the “top 10 hacks to grow your LinkedIn today”

Or a 60-minute Personal Branding masterclass… or a top 10 Ted Talks to watch.

But won’t make much difference until you fix everything else in my life to make space for growth to come.

So, as a New Year challenge, pick ONE thing you’re going to be consistent on.

Reply to this email with what it is, and let the GAMES begin.

Let’s see who’s truly serious… and who’s not ;)

Let this be the year where you are the main character.

That’s literally it!

Happy New Year.

Love you so much

Love,

The other main character x

PS: Relaunching my cohort in February. Reply to this email with a HELL YEA if you want early-bird access to the tools that changed MY life.